The call of The Jay
is from my childhood
The Gull my present day
The Crow is of my new reality
The Willet Jordan Bay
The Chickadee is my mother
as the window opens wide
Eye sit to listen as I’m told
and always question Why
On what would have been
My 34th Anniversary to Eva’s first son
Eye fed Her a lunch
of 4 bites of turkey
1 bowl of Mandarin orange slices
and a banana brought in from the car
She asked for another cup
of coffee
and had me feel Her Legs —
bare calves below short capris —
She told me They were cold
and she was right.
Eye asked for a blanket
and when it came
Eye wrapped it around
as best I could
to sit with Her awhile longer
but then a nurse appeared
and Eva was wheeled away
Last night eye drove with Dr Blair
on the spur of the moment
to Shut-down Halifax
in His Black Mobster Car
usually used by His Girlfriend
to turn in for one night
a wild night
to The Prince George Hotel
where Eye had The Dream of A Lifetime
@ 4:30 am —
It was theatrical and questionable
and highly energetic
and Eye woke from the end
lying on a floor encased in warmth
with the comforting licking
of My Former Husband
in My Right Ear
Eye have lived a divided love life:
Peter was and is the father
of my three children
since 1987
David has had my heart
since 1993
butt he’s married
Hunter had my twat
since 1999
butt Eye got mad at him —
he claims Eye gave what we had
away —
so now Eye have my self
without a man
and Eye am a woman
who needs a man
for family
for heart
for gratification
and for partnership
Eye have never had a partner
for my art
Eye just saw My Mother
flitting in My Apple Tree —
It’s dead, The Tree
but here She was
A Chickadee
Our skin on our cheek
does not have to peel away
from the palm it rests upon.
We could keep on walking
if we had somewhere to go
and a little help to get us there.
We do not have to lose our teeth.
We do not have to lose our minds
if others can relate to us on some level.
We do not have to stop sex.
We can keep on living
if we take care of ourselves
and if others help us
to care for ourselves.
Eye got up to dance
to Sweet Child of Mine
then switched to classical
on the French Radio Station.
Eye fed Astro his half can
and the others their treats
(so as not to discriminate)
& cleaned their litter.
Eye put the dishes away.
Eye made my decaf
and got out the glass table tops
for my wrought iron deck furniture
& one folding wooden chair
from a yard sale at the church
where my writers group meets.
The Cats are with me
out here on the deck —
We are together
with the wafting radio
and the bird song
Eye love.
Eye know a skinny broad
Who isn’t very nice
Eye don’t know why I’m writing this
Except Eye wish her slice
Was filled with venom
From her mouth
Though how Eye do not know
She warrants my ferocity
Butt would Eye stoop that low
Eye have a morning room
collecting sun
allowing my paintings to glitter.
Eye sit beside its picture window
to drink my morning decaf and cream
to dream of companionship
with a man I saw briefly
only yesterday
but with whom Eye share
My Eternity
Eye used to throw one leg
up and over my husband’s hip
lying in The Hawk Queen Bed —
He didn’t mind — rather enjoyed it I think
and Eye could go to sleep in that position.
Now Eye have a carved-out pillow
to replace Him
and what does He have?
Joanna Gilman Hyde 