God It Would Be So Nice
2 Have Loving Arms Around Me
As Eye Stand
@ M(eye) Hawk Kitchen Outpost
Looking @ M(eye) Scraggly Apple —
The Dead Tree Eye Won’t Cut Down —
It Stands Naked
In The Wind
While Eye Stand Inside
w/ 4 Cats
& 1 Pet Gull
On M(eye) Deck Rail
Just Came Back
From A Coffee w/ Milford
The Exceptional Bird-Carver
Who Gave Me A Calendar
Showing lmages of Intricate Work:
Flowing Feathers, Cocked Duck-heads
(He Says He Can Carve
Anything w/ Feathers)
& Eye Have Decided
2 Commission
The Replication of My Indian Ring Neck —
SAM
Milford’s 1st Tropical Bird*
*note — Milford Gerald Hopkins died one month after the writing of this poem. SAM was never carved.
Eye Searched & Searched
For M(eye) Past Post
Recounting The T(eye)me
M(eye) Father Pimped Me Off
2 An Arab
Butt Eye Couldn’t F(eye)nd It
What If M(eye) 1
Surviving Cat
Was M(eye) Beloved Astro —
23 Pounds of BLACKNESS —
Eye Would Be A Witch
Butt Who Would M(eye) Potions
Be For?
Eye Have Lived Alone
In This House
For 7 Years
& Now It Has A New Roof.
As The Last Screw
Went Into A Skylight
It Shattered & Rained Down
All Over M(eye) Livingroom —
Butt As The Tomato-coloured Couch
Was Moved
2 Sweep Up The Little Glass Chunks
M(eye) Black Velvet Hair Bow Was Found
By 1 of The Crew
& Was Left For Me
2 Find Anew.
The Tomato-coloured Couch
October 20, 2023
2:50 pm
Was Eye “Mentally Ill”
For 30 Years
Since M(eye) Mother Died
Sending The Shower of Silver Lights
Down On M(eye) Head
Engulfing Me
On March 31st 1993
Convincing Me
Eye Was The 2nd Coming of Christ —
Was That “Mental Illness”?
Was Eye “Mentally Ill”
2 Fall In Love w/ A Leprechaun
Who Thought Eye Was A SEER
On April Fool’s Day 1993 —
Was Eye “Mentally Ill”
During That Summer
When Eye Wanted Desperately 2 Die
Because Eye Felt Nothing
Butt Hospital Walls
& Bedding?
Was Eye “Mentally Ill”
When Eye Spoke 2 The Leprechaun
& He Embraced Me
On October 22nd 1993
& Sent Me The Telepathic Message
of Spiritual Love
During 1 Dark Night
In Yet Another Hospital —
& Was Eye “Mentally Ill”
When The Next Day
Eye Created M(eye) Self
& Had That Fight w/ God
Who Wanted Me 2 Serve Him
& Eye Refused?
Was It “Mental Illness”
2 Have The Apparition
of The Beautiful Dark Haired Woman
Appear On M(eye) Right Shoulder
2 Say The Most Melodious Words
Eye Had Ever Heard:
“YOU KNOW THE MEANING OF LIFE
AND SO YOU ARE A STAR —
SO GO TO SLEEP”
?
That Was All In 1993
30 Years Ago
& Eye Wrote The Book
About That Year
& The 2 Before It
& Up 2 1996
Which Took In The October 15th Birth
of M(eye) Beautiful Blonde Daughter
Eliza, Yes, In 1994 —
Eliza Came Out of The Death
of M(eye) Mother —
Eliza Would Not Exist
w/out The Death —
& Then Maria —
M(eye) Poor Maria —
Killed March 27 1997
The Anniversary of M(eye) Mother’s Death
The Horror of Which
Was Painted Out
Was Written Out
Was Met By Spiritual Force
On December 18 2016
Inside The Middle La Have Church
Coming Down On Me
Engulfing Me —
Was THAT “Mental Illness”??
The Hawk Kitchen Outpost
October 18 2023
finished @ 7:45 am
“Eye Search The Horizon
For The Sun
Along A Band of Cloud —
Eye Drink M(eye) Decaf
Now Having Won
& Feel That Eye Am Proud”
The Clouds Illumine
In Flaming Pink —
Eye Wait 2 See The Sun —
Is It Behind?
The Pink Is Gone
Now Tinted Gold —
Eye Wait 2 See The Spark of Sun
Surely As It Climbs —
M(eye) View Is Blocked
By Golden Cloud —
Oh There’s A Glimmer
Like An Eye
Its Rays R Reaching
Across The Sea
Into M(eye) Kitchen
For Me 2 See
2 Blink Its Incandescence – y
Why Did Eye Dream
of A Dirty White Running Bear
Scaring Me & Peter
Attacking A Moose
or A Horse
Ripping The Neck Out of It
Having 2 Be Shot
While Eye Caved Into Peter’s Arms
Huddling w/ Him
Crying Profusely?
NOTE:
Had A Dream of Hilbert
(Our Jack Russell from 1992)
& A Very Large Snake
Which Followed Us Into A House
& Eye Had 2 Capture It
w/ A Square Plastic Bag
2 Put It Outside
Where It Writhed In The Plastic
& Eye Was Afraid It Would Suffocate
Eye Am Empowered By M(eye) Past
Experiences Divine
Eye May Walk Amongst Others
Sharing The Line
of Illumination, Hallucination
It All Becomes Mine
2 Have & 2 Hold
For The Rest of M(eye) Time
Joanna Gilman Hyde 