Joanna Gilman Hyde

"Good Morning, World!"

Month: July, 2016

JUST HOW BAD WAS I?

The Hawk Deck 12:05pm

On this very beautiful day

in July

just how bad was I

when I insisted to My Husband

on December 18

that I go back to the hospital

dressed in a black negligee

bare feet

and bullet proof vest?

Just how bad was I

when My Children came home

that Christmas

and left My House?

I was on

a double dose of Olanzapine

the poison I have been off

now for one month

of nearly halcyon existence

I need My Children —

They can help Me change

the music in My Car

from Joy Division and Future Islands

to something new and cogent

I CALLED GOOD MORNING TO MY NEIGHBOUR

The Hawk Window Seat 7:40am

On this one month anniversary

since seeing My Good Morning Rainbow

and stopping the poisoning of My Brain

I have woken up to The Pair

of Cow Birds

on My Car Mirror —

the first I have seen

of Her

A CHORUS OF CAT BELLS

The Hawk West Desk Window 8:11pm

By this time tomorrow

We’ll have a chorus of cat bells

around the necks of five nude cats

(one hunter has two bells already)

after the fact

of one tiny yellow bird leg

a gut the size of a dime

and three yellow feathers

left by Somebody

on My Sacred Deck

INVESTIGATION INTO DRUG-INDUCED PSYCHOSIS

The Hawk Kitchen Outpost 8:4am

A pristine line of Silver

augments My Grey Horizon

I woke this morning @ 3:30

and took a Melatonin and Gravol

and slept from 5:00 to 7:00

ignoring the scratching of cats

to put the coffee on

@ 8:00

My Doctor/Husband has My Pile of Medical Records

from The Yarmouth Regional Psych Unit

spread out on His Library Floor

LAST LEG

The Hawk Kitchen Outpost 4:30pm

I have come through

an oven of madness

I have been broiled

and poked

for The Life of My Daughter

for My Son since He was five

when I made a pact

with My Self

that I would never feel

the pain of the loss

of My Mother

and found instead

the love that sustained Me

through My Temperature Gage

of Molten Silver

and Highest Reverie

I have spoken

of My Vile Nature

black with burnt offerings

of Salvation

for The Masses

yet to come

I am out

on the table

for dinner with My Starving Family

My Ex Husband I loved

in the sun

of Our First House,

a tiny one

I am out,

reposing

to be eaten now

with Mint Jelly

from the shady side

of My Mother’s Well

 

CAR DREAM

The Hawk Queen Bed 9:12am

Last night I dreamed

all night it seemed

of a car being repaired

with trays of crystalline candy

delivered by a female mechanic

to the body of the vehicle

My Brain?

outside My Bedroom Window —

an exhausting dream

but necessary

for My Most Restorative Sleep

CROSSINGS

The Hawk Kitchen Outpost 6:14pm

I missed the cutest waddle

of a mother duck and Her Ducklings

crossing The Hawk Road

while I was zooming

sleep-deprived

to get to The Little Store —

I swerved to avoid the adorable clutch

and got mad at My Self

but not mad enough to slow down

in time to take in

the rare amusement

of Their very serious venture

THE LAVENDER ROOM

The West Desk Window 11:25am

Eliza’s lovely little room

was an assignment

for Me to sleep

and By God I slept —

I slept and woke —

woke and slept and dreamed

and tossed off My Love Ring Quilt

and watched The Sun emerge

from The Eastern Waters —

I listened to the early birds

the crows and gulls

and song birds

and yes, the funny funny Rooster

I watched The Sun hit

the wall by the door

and now I am out of there

I have returned to My Husband

and The Cats —

the old dilapidated comforter

the mismatched sheets

and the open window to The West

 

JOY TRACKS

Eliza’s Room 8:43pm

As I walked the lines

of shoes and sneakers

measured in the sand

I saw a track of feet so bare

veer off into the frothy foam

I wondered at the line

of tide which consumed

their salty prints

and merely as a bonus

saw

their re-emergence

further on

TO BE A BIRD

The Hawk Deck 1:50pm

What Does It Mean

To Be A Bird?

Not Just That You

Can Fly —

You can take care of Your Self —

feed Your Self & Your Young —

(though not Your Young if You’re a Cow Bird)

preen Your Self & bathe

stretch Your Wings & Your Claw Feet

fluff up Your Glistening Feathers & bow

Exclaim from Your Perch —

Yes, Exclaim

in Your God-given Voice

that You are Happy

To Be Alive