Joanna Gilman Hyde

"Good Morning, World!"

Tag: poetry

MY HUSBAND DR BLAIR

The Tomato-coloured Couch 2:54pm

I have fallen into

the role of Doctor’s Wife

however unnaturally —

it’s taken sixteen years

since I first became attracted

to Dr Blair

The Sexiest Man In My Book

in His Office Clothes

I now lay out

along with His Oatmeal

and raisins —

lunch @ 1:00

supper @ 6:00

I wait for His Parcels

in the afternoon

and take pop to His Secretary —

She appreciates Me so

RADIATING LINES

The Hawk Laundry Room 9:35am

There’s a circular label permanently stuck

to the lid of My Washing Machine

It has multiple radiating lines

to attract attention

It blasts “IMPORTANT!”

(like My Halo)

but all It says is:

“Please return your Product Registration Card

within 10 days”

MID-WEEK

The Hawk Window Seat 8:46am

I’ve picked out

My Husband’s Wednesday attire —

Dockers M made in Vietnam

pin-striped shirt

charcoal grey wool trousers

LL Bean size 34″ by 29″

He’s in the tub

& I’m in Eliza’s black negligee

ready to wash Dr Blair’s

magnificent hair

LL BEAN

The Tomato-coloured Couch 5:18pm

Thousands of Women in Sri Lanka

sew My Husband’s shirts

& fasten countless buttons

for Me to undo

one by one

MY HALO

The Tomato-coloured Couch 3:24pm

My Halo has Me Speak

My Oracle — where I pronounce

I Am The 2nd Coming

of

What?

The 2nd Coming

of

Twat

MY ORACLE

The Tomato-coloured Couch 12:50pm

It started in The Shower

last fall

against the white

bathroom stall

& then I started seeing

It against the white

dishwasher in My Kitchen

I even carried It

into Sobey’s

one night while Hunter

waited in the car

I saw It again last night

& watched It circle My Head

in The Mirror of My All

SCIENCE EXPERIMENT GONE AWRY

The Hawk Kitchen 3:20pm

a puddle of smouldering rust

resides in the base

of My Lamp’s Crystal Ball

— did I tell You I cleaned It?

two days ago I held the stem of The Lamp sideways

under a running tap

and lathered the dusty cut glass

with a toothbrush

and rinsed It and so soaked It

enough to have the fake brass flanges leak

whereby My New Crystal Ball fogged up

at the top when righted

water collected on the bottom

with no apparent outlet

and sits there turning brown

like an accidental terrarium

MY FRIEND

The Hawk Kitchen 9:38am

I have My Kitchen Witch —

It’s a hand-carved, hand-painted Blue Jay

fat, sitting by My Sink Window

looking out

watching over Me

while I make

egg plant parmesan

DIVERSIFICATION

The Tomato-coloured Couch 7:39pm

I’m seeing The Universe again

this time on the behind

of My Navy Blue Long Johns

static-y with cat hair

globules of fuzz, lint

& God knows what all

WOMAN

The Hawk Kitchen 2:10pm

I stood in The Portal

of My House

waving good-bye

to My Husband after

lunch —

I stood

as A Woman

not just of The House

but of The World