My soon-to-be-X
recently messaged
My Daughter Eliza
that he would like to see Me
“left twisting in the wind –”
well there’s a storm tonight
and Eye am here by My Self
cozy in My Bed
with The Power still on
20 years ago She was His Patient
when She had an affair
with Dr Blair —
then She lived with Him
for 5 years
then They got married
for 14
and Divorced
to find both in separate places:
Hers on The Hawk
His to South Side
where They meet along the wide-open beaches
connecting
just to drive each other crazy
My Divorcing Husband
has allowed Me to become
The Social Outcast
Who walks My expansive beach alone
Who sleeps with
The Virginal Banana
Who reads Her Verse
dressed like a vamp
while He refuses to ask
“How did it go?”
I
He used to say:
“I love Your Toes –”
and didn’t know why
so nobody knows
II
He once wrote:
“I love You to distraction –”
It came at a time
when I was a fraction
of My Former Self
at His Behest
when We were installed
as His Daughter’s Guests
III
Her voice rang clear
the morning We left:
“You don’t give a fuck
about your grandchildren — ”
and so goes My Quest
for compensation regarding My Past
twenty years of seclusion by Him —
He Who assured Me
He never would fail
to deliver support
if I fell off The Rail
which I did once or twice
(but not into His Arms)
though I stayed as His Wife
and buttered His Charms
IV
It’s over now —
I’m cutting My Loss
of One Child’s Silence
I am willing to toss
to remain in My Stead
I ask to be free
of The Bonds of This Marriage
strung on The Cross
The Hawk Queen Bed 8:00am
When I left My Children’s Father
fourteen years ago in June
I left My Clothes in Atlantic
I left The Pets
I left My Share of The Atlantic House
I left money in a joint bank account
I left two enormous pieces of furniture
The Secretary & High Boy inherited from The Woman I was named after —
I left Them in The Divorce Papers for Peak & Eliza
I had to leave My Kids
because I couldn’t take care of Them
Joanna Gilman Hyde 