The Hawk Portico 5:03pm
I thrive on The Sounds
of The Birds
especially when I hear
nothing else
but the not-so-far-off shore
of Hawk Inlet
I am released
of all other
concerns
I live through the countless calls
of Avian Wildlife
singing into My Cells
regenerating
My Issuance
of Life
The Tomato-coloured Couch 4:08pm
I remember clearly
that sinking feeling
of having no choice but to lie down
on a couch or bed
for want of Living Life
where I covered My Self
with a blanket or Afghan
knitted by My Mother-in-law
to take as some form
of comfort
to get through
an endless day
out of weeks
months
years
The Hawk Deck 10:46am
I’m on The Knife Edge Of Happiness
I could whine & have My Doctor Husband
stay home from work
with Me
but We would only talk
circuitously
I would still hear the birds
only through My anxious
stomach
The Tomato-coloured Couch 5:11pm
I have craved Fame & Glory
as badly as any
suicide-ed poet
— I have made attempts
on My Own Life —
but more-so have I
striven to live
as I do now
when My Work is being read
every day & every day
I am not dead
The Hawk Dining Room 12:18pm
Why do I feel so much better?
is the same question as
Why do I feel so terrible?
There is no one answer for either
so I will revel in My Contentedness
and dismiss the recollection
of Darker Days
The Hawk Corner Room 1:15pm
Do My Cells Know
I Am Exhibiting
“A Failure To Thrive” —
Do They Know I Have Not Eaten Lunch
& That I Cannot
Possibly Take The Cats To The Vet
Tomorrow
For Their Annual Inoculations?
The Hawk Corner Room 5:30pm
Years ago I was housed
in a big white living room
— a doctor’s quarters —
over-looking a busy highway
— too busy for Me —
as I lay on a long white couch
for the day, or weeks even
in My Transition from hospital stays
to this room, The Room Of My Arrival
here on The Hawk
with a big wide window
over-looking
the sustaining ocean
of Survival
The Hawk West Desk Window 2:45pm
I used to go to churches
and found them hollow places
Who there would hear of My Unstoppable
Shower Of Lights?
Who there could understand The Depths
of My Enclosed Depression?
–
I used to go to churches
looking for companionship
in the rawness of being broken open
like the delicate egg
I was trying to carry
–
I used to go to churches
when I wanted to die instead —
where no Minister could make Me
whole
and no friend could balance Me
–
I used to go to churches
and now I am Home
years beyond the fragility
in the compatibility
of My Marriage
where My House is
My Church
The Hawk Deck 9:03am
This has been The Place
of My Full Recovery
from My Mother’s Death
of more than Twenty Years
This is The Place of My Happiness and Joy
with Molten Silver on The Sea
Bird Life, Cat Life
My Life and My Husband’s
–
The Hawk Living Room Window 4:43pm
My Serenity Level
cannot be measured
there is no equipment
like The Blood Sugar Thing
there is only The Sun
streaming in over Me
as I sit on the end
of The Tomato-coloured Couch
with The Window open
airing in The Waves
from The Southern Tip
of The Hawk
Joanna Gilman Hyde 